Dear Michelle… I hope this is a temporary thing.. I have not lost my voice, only the desire to move my mouth to talk. I had oral surgery last week and my mouth hurts! The dentist says it will all be better soon and I will have a beautiful smile with my new false teeth. Praying for both of us and wishing you a happy new year girl! Hugs! Glad your still here with or without a voice.

Posted on January 5, 2012 at 5:20:05 PM by Patricia

 Oh Patricia, mouth work is never fun…keep reminding yourself of that beautiful smile you have :) thanks for the prayers xoxo

Posted on January 5, 2012 at 6:25:59 PM by Michelle

If your voice doesn’t come back, see an ENT —yeah, another doctor is not what you want, I know —damage to the larynx and the accompanying nerves can happen in head and neck surgery too.

Posted on January 5, 2012 at 6:06:00 PM by Andrea

 You know me too well…..another Dr to add to my long list just doesn’t sound appealing :(. I’m going to give it another month and take it from there. Hugs … ;)

Posted on January 5, 2012 at 6:27:41 PM by Michelle

I was thinking of Ariel in Disney’s ‘The Little Mermaid,’ when the mean witch steals Ariels voice.
I hope it comes back! Get a writing pad. If nothing else, you can draw pictures of people who bug you. :O
Carol

Posted on January 5, 2012 at 9:27:29 PM by Carol

 Lmao. Thanks for the laugh. Haha

Posted on January 12, 2012 at 7:53:10 AM by Michelle

We can all hear you, Michelle! Is there any type of voice therapy that can help restore your vocal chord function? I’m sorry you are dealing with just one more thing and I hope that it will improve with time. Please know that I am thinking of you and you are still in my prayers!

Hugs—
Martha

Posted on January 6, 2012 at 5:28:24 AM by Private User

This must be so frustrating, Michelle. I wonder if there’s any kind of physical therapy that would help with the voice? You just don’t need any more crap to deal with, it’s really not fair. We need our voices-how are we supposed to yell at our kids and husband without them? :) And btw-we are grateful you are here too. That part is awesome! Hugs-Ann

Posted on January 6, 2012 at 10:13:51 AM by Ann

 My sentiments exactly :). You know it just dawned on me that I need to tell my family when mommy is talking…get infrobt of me so you can read my lips. Seems as though I’m always needing to make adjustments. I think I’m not asking a lot if only they hmmm really do it. I can see snarky 7 year old not carrying and 12 year old too lazy to get off XBox. Lmao. Hubby….well…u know the drill :)

Posted on January 12, 2012 at 7:52:31 AM by Michelle

Dear Michelle, I’ve been trying to get my voice back for months, after Radiation.
It’s a slooooow process. There’s a reason they say “patience is a virtue”.
For months I carried a dry-marker pad. I found people did take the time to wait to see what I’d write. (Actually, it also helped me to organize my thoughts more.)
I’m used to high speed comic bantering, so this has been extremely difficult. (Comic torture!)
On the other hand I taught my boss how to do cell phone texting. And he no longer expects me to pick up the phone whenever he calls. So the upside is having trained him to be slightly more patient with me.
My ENT did refer me to a speech therapist; and I’ve had about 3 sessions. They are making a big difference. My voice still has no stamina, but I’m learning how to talk with less vocal stress.
It’s going to be a long road back for me, but I can now do short sentences, for a few minutes, before my voice gives out.
I know, I know, this is too much me and not enough Michelle.

There’s no magic mic, or drink, etc. Common sense rules: rest your voice as much as possible. DON’T STRAIN. You might practice simple vowel sounds for a few minutes a day.
Sandyjo recently posted a good list of swallowing exercises, some of which are excellent for your larynx.
Dairy does add to mucus, which complicates trying to talk.
Definitely drink as much water as you can handle. Our delicate vocal chords need lots of hydration.
It’s important to practice breathing from your diaphram. That’s half the battle.
Avoid things that dry your throat, like alcohol. (Oh snap!)
On the upside, you will probably find that people are amazingly patient. I apologize for my voice continually, and even store clerks are wonderfully attentive and encouraging. (Perhaps a bonus of this lousy economy.)
If funds are a problem for speech therapy you might seek out the help of someone who sings in a choral group or choir, for some vocal rehabilitation. Perhaps there is a vocational tech school, or music school, or speech therapy training near you which would love to have people like us to practice on.
Of course some days all I want to do is whisper, but whispering is actually more damaging to vocal chords. Avoid whispering “like the plague”.
I love how BFAC is a place I can come to and hear you loud and clear.
Hugs to you, Nicole

Posted on January 6, 2012 at 1:32:05 PM by Nicole (Lady Of The Larynx)

 Wow….thank you so much for your post Nicole :). Your experiences help mine…so share as much as you can. I will try what you’ve advised….thanks again :)

Posted on January 12, 2012 at 7:48:33 AM by Michelle

Very glad you like my comments. Didn’t mean to get so talkie & ramble on.
I hope there’s something that works for you.
You’re very welcome, Michelle  

Posted on January 15, 2012 at 8:07:29 PM by Nicole (Lady Of The Larynx)

I am so sorry. Have you asked her if there is any therapy or anything you can do that will help your voice? I will pray hard that there is something you can do that will help. Hang in there and don’t give up. My love, thoughts and prayers are with you each and every day.
Hugs,

Posted on January 6, 2012 at 2:48:10 PM by Joyce In NC

 You are too sweet to me Joyce. Thank you for the prayers.

Posted on January 12, 2012 at 7:49:28 AM by Michelle

I just read what Nicole said. I think she has some great advice. As I said before … hang in there and don’t give up.

Posted on January 6, 2012 at 2:52:42 PM by Joyce In NC

I usually have nothing to add if I come in after Nicole, Ann, Andrea or Marshall and I’m always thinking what Ann says first (yelling at the kids)...
Buy a whistle and let them know they DON’T want to hear it cause it means serious business :)
Maybe we can start calling you “Coach”
xoxo

Posted on January 25, 2012 at 3:10:37 PM by Debbie

I love your humor, it put the emphasis on a more positive note.

Posted on January 28, 2012 at 7:43:26 PM by Spongebob46

Michelle,
I hope you will post an update soon. I hope you are feeling better. I think about you a lot. It is difficult on here sometimes, because I want to catch up on everyone I “know”, and then there are new people all the time. Darn!
The bills . . . It’s depressing. I am so grateful for medical insurance. Still, there are endless bills. Get one paid and there are many more right behind it. And, I know there are people here who have to have multiple surgeries, etc. whose bills are more than mine. Still, it’s depressing. I have no advice. I’m sorry. I can send you a HUG???? You can vent???
Anyway, I hope you are better.
Carol

Posted on February 25, 2012 at 10:14:53 PM by Carol

Another birthday! Yes, that is what we strive for. And I hope you have a wonderful birthday Michelle! Sending you a big hug and some extra birthday wishes and prayers.

Posted on April 16, 2012 at 7:12:21 AM by Patricia

♫ Happy Birthday to you ♫
♫ Happy Birthday to you ♫
♫ Happy Birthday dear Michelle ♫
♫ Happy Birthday to you ♫
♫ Have a beautiful and blessed day ♫
♫ Love, Hugs, Prayers & Blessings ♫
♫ Joyce In NC ♫

Posted on April 18, 2012 at 8:12:48 PM by Joyce In NC

Happy birthday, Michelle! May you have many, many, many more!

Danean

Posted on April 19, 2012 at 10:24:10 AM by Danean

Michelle,
Just wondering how you are doing and letting you know I am thinking about you and praying for you.
Carol

Posted on April 26, 2012 at 7:15:58 PM by Carol

Michelle?? Are you able to give us an update? I hope so! Thinking of you.

Carol

Posted on May 11, 2012 at 10:24:05 PM by Carol

I have regular insurance that surprisingly enough did a good job paying for it and I have Cancer Insurance that sends money to help out. If I had been with my 1st husband I think we would have drown in debt or I would have died due to not being able to get help.

Posted on December 30, 2011 at 12:36:04 PM by Private User

 What’s cancer insurance?

Posted on January 5, 2012 at 6:32:30 PM by Michelle

 It pays you money to be used while you are going through “stuff”. mine is called American Heritage Life Insurance and it is through AllState. You can also check AFLAK, they may have it, too.

Posted on January 6, 2012 at 8:01:51 AM by Private User

What an awful thing your mom did, whatever for? I am so sorry to see this post…

I have to agree with you, being positive is not a certain key to cure, and it’s wrong for people to suggest that it is your fault, you are too negative or that kind of blarney, if you are having problems. I am sorry for your loss, esp since your family has been so detached.

I am one of the fortunate – with Medicare, which has been wonderful for this illness. I hope to heaven that they don’t start to ruin it by providing vouchers for private insurance. None of us will be able to afford our bills after that.

There must be some kind of social services even though Va is not known as the most progressive of states…can you talk to them about your insurance and debt problems? Perhaps through your church?

And maybe find some support system to help you since your family has failed that test? Someone to call?

Posted on December 30, 2011 at 1:56:56 PM by Private User

 Hubby makes too much. They say people that make 40k a year w/ a family of 4 is more like it. Wth. How do people live on that? But I am looking into resources. :)

Posted on January 5, 2012 at 6:31:23 PM by Michelle

 Just sending you a hug…

Posted on January 5, 2012 at 8:08:13 PM by Private User

Michelle,

I understand the medical bills. Believe me! My suggestions would be to see if your doctors and/or hospitals have any programs that can help you out financially. I have had hospitals slash hundreds off my bill, or just accept what insurance paid. Doctors aren’t so easy. but they will work with you. Cancer centers have grants and you might be eligible. Just be honest with everyone and tell them what you can afford. After my first bout, we sold our house because we were retiring to Montana (my husband had become disabled) and paid off everything. We also cashed out our retirement fund. I feel pretty guilty that I ruined my husbands retirement dreams, but he he said he would rather have me.

I, too, lost my group of cancer friends. We met at radiation therapy. Out of the four, I am the only one left, and I agree, it is hard. But you are here for a reason and I know that although my friends lost the fight, they are cheering me on. I am sorry for your loss.

You are not alone. We are all going through this. Hang in there. Hugs.

Posted on December 30, 2011 at 3:31:07 PM by Private User

I agree with Rainy. Check with the cancer center and the Cancer Assocation in your town to see if they can be of any help. It is hard to have to do it but be honest and upfront with everyone about your financial situation. Also check with Social Service. I had very good insurance the first time I had cancer in 1994 that paid all my bills. The second time in 2005 I was on Medicare and lacked a year being old enough to get a Medicare supplement. I applied for help at the cancer center in South Carolina and they agreed to be satisfied with what Medicare paid. It is a lot of headaches to do all this but alot of the time it will pay off.
I am sorry about your Mom. What a shame that she couldn’t just BE THERE FOR YOU when you needed her, instead of what she did.
I am sorry about your friends. None of us know and will probably never know why we lived and the ones we loved didn’t. When I was 16 my sister died at the age of 35 from cancer and my dear best friend (also 16) died shortly after from complications of polio. I am now 70 years old and I have wondered so many times WHY I LIVED and they died but I still don’t know. I know you are going through an awful time and I am so sorry. I wish I could make it better for you. My love, thoughts and prayers are with you each and every day.
Love, hugs and prayers,
Joyce In NC

Posted on December 30, 2011 at 4:55:44 PM by Joyce In NC

 Yes, you are right about how we are around, and the others not. I will always wonder. Life is definitely a mystery. thanks for being there Joyce :)

Posted on January 5, 2012 at 6:40:04 PM by Michelle

The debt was one of the first things I thought of right after hearing that I had cancer. How in the world was I going to pay for this? Before I even left the appointment, I met with the hospitals social worker who told me to file for disability, SSI, and all sorts of other stuff. At the time, I had NO insurance. I was panicking. It was all coming on so fast. Finding out I had cancer and filing for disability, all in one day. I had already had surgery at this hospital the month before diagnosis so I had already filed for financial assistance which covered me for an entire year at 100%. When I had my staging surgery at another hospital, they also had a charity type of program that covered all my stay and surgery. All I had to pay was my surgeons fee and all the other doctors fees. I’m still paying on that to this day, over a year later. They even turned over half my claim to a collection agency. uhg! However, by applying for every possible financial assistance possible, I only have to pay about $6k instead of over $50k. So my advice to you, even on past debt, see what financial assistance your hospital/clinic has available.

Posted on December 31, 2011 at 7:32:19 AM by Private User

 I will, thank you Angela.

Posted on January 5, 2012 at 6:34:36 PM by Michelle

 That’s great….to the alternative! 6k is a lot better then 50k :).

Posted on January 5, 2012 at 6:41:09 PM by Michelle

Hi Michelle,
For medical debt, I suggest we all move to Canada or the UK. It infuriates me that in this country we are so inhumane that people with cancer are put in extreme financial stress. Hospitals and doctors will work out payment plans for people. Cry in the office if you need to, whatever it takes to make them understand how difficult these expenses are for your family.

I had a little adventure in my family as well with my medical records at Hopkins. My dad has a close friend who is a thyroid endocrinologist at UCLA. When I was diagnosed, my dad was concerned that I was seeing a community endo instead of someone at Hopkins, and he also wanted to be sure my surgeon was good. He called his friend at UCLA, who then contacted a colleague at Hopkins. The endo at Hopkins read my records and emailed back to my dad’s friend. They all decided that there wasn’t a HIPAA problem because I’d told my dad technical details.(!) My dad forwarded all the emails to me after—he did all this without asking me. At first I was taken aback and angry. Then I thought about it and realized I had gotten free second and third opinions from two top endocrinologists. They both felt that my regular endo had made all the right decisions, and the doc at Hopkins assured as well that my surgeon was excellent. My dad was trying to protect me, even though I was 58 years old at the time. I think the difference from your situation is that my dad sent me all the emails and info once he had collected it. But, yeah, it was definitely a strange feeling to suddenly read all this.

You had a tough 2011. The new year must be better. Here’s to a healthy 2012.

Love,
Andrea

Posted on December 31, 2011 at 9:01:13 PM by Andrea

The thought of insurance and debt completely drives me crazy! At times like this I feel punished that I work and have a job! I haven’t gotten my hospital bill for my part yet for the surgery and the first 15 day stay but the first bill pending insurance was $195,000! Just waiting for them to let me know my share. But I ended up back in the hospital for week after I was home for a week. That bill was $65,000. The hospital wrote off $52,000. My insurance was billed $5,300. And my portion of the bill is $6,500! Now how fair is this that I have to pay more then my insurance company? Well I calculate that $6,500 is 10% of $65,000. So I am assuming that I will have to pay $19,500 for my surgery visit since the total bill there was $$195,000. I am a single parent of a college student so let me just write them a check like they asked me too! Right now I live paycheck to paycheck before this $26,000! I am so fortunate with my doctors! They take what my insurance pays and I have not had any out of pocket expense with them. Sorry this frustrates me sometimes! If I didn’t work, the government would pick up the tab but since I work, I am going to have to take On a second job to get this debt paid off. Just doesn’t seem fair sometimes! Ok, enough of my pity party! Can’t change it! It is what it is!

Posted on January 1, 2012 at 1:38:53 PM by Private User

I am sorry about the passing of your friends. And what your Mom did is illegal. I am glad she got “shut down” by your onc. I am wishing you happiness and health in 2012. I have no answers about medical debt. I have great insurance and managed to get back to work before my short-term disability turned to long-term disability (where I would have had to pay for some medical bills out of pocket). Have you applied for SSDI? Are you eligible for state-funded medical insurance or Medicare? Please get with a social worker at your cancer center to try to help develop a resource list of sources to help with medical bills if possible. Take care.

Posted on January 2, 2012 at 2:34:23 PM by Private User

I’m  on SS disability but not SSI. Hubby makes too much…which is a joke.

Posted on January 5, 2012 at 6:38:08 PM by Michelle

Hi Michelle,
I must assume your Mom was trying to look after you, or she never would have violated your privacy. I will leave the legal discussion out of my comments. You have an absolute right to privacy in your medical records, and anyone who would breach that privacy is potentially liable for significant damages.

I am blessed with insurance that has covered majority of my medical costs. I know there are agencies that will waive the medical expenses based on financial needs. Now is not the time to be concerned with incurring any medical debt, you need to be concerned with continuing treatment and let the numbers keep rolling upwards—you can worry about that later when you are well. God bless you Michelle, you will be in my thoughts and in my prayers.

Posted on January 2, 2012 at 7:34:16 PM by Finney

 Thank you Finney. I miss you & your blogging. I guess I will take your advice and worry at a later date. Hey….the bills are late as it is…... Ha :)

Posted on January 5, 2012 at 6:36:32 PM by Michelle

Michelle,
I don’t know what to advise regarding the medical debt. My own debt gets me down, but I am trying to plug along. All I can say is see if you can make payments—to everyone. (and I know my bills are less than yours)
How are you feeling?
Your mother can lose her job AND get in HUGE trouble! Even though I despise HIPPA, what she did is a big, big . .crud, I lost my word. Suffice it to say it’s a no, no.
I am sorry for the loss of your dear friends. I continue to pray for you and for your not-so-supportive family. Much love and a BIG HUG. :)
Carol

Posted on January 5, 2012 at 9:24:20 PM by Carol

Thinking of you. Canada is a great country…we are always looking for amazing new people ;) It drives me crazy when I hear of the amount of medical debt people carry in the US…just craziness.

Posted on January 8, 2012 at 7:08:19 PM by Rachel